The Viscount's Lover
by KaariJGib
Summary: Matthew Shepard is a wealthy young gentleman, and Kaidan's mother doesn't approve of him because of his social standing, but that has never impeded their friendship. Kaidan is a young Viscount of marriageable age, but he only has eyes for the man who has been his friend since childhood. ((Cover Art by Chenria on Tumblr!))


A light knock on the door brought Kaidan's head up from his ledgers. He had to blink a few times to focus because he'd been concentrating so hard on the lists of printed numbers for several hours. He sat back in his chair and rubbed a hand over his eyes to relieve their strain. The interruption was unwanted, but probably for the best as he felt the beginnings of a headache forming in his temples. "Come," he called.

Adams entered, carrying a silver tray with a pristine white calling card in the center. "You've a guest, m'lord," he said.

Kaidan sighed because he really did not wish for company at the moment. He'd only been home from London for a day, and he had a fair amount of business to attend to, but he'd known that this was inevitable. His mother had been all aflutter with plans at dinner the previous night. It wouldn't surprise him if she'd sent runners to all the neighbors as soon as he'd arrived. She'd already uttered the words "welcoming party" more than once within his hearing.

Grimacing at the thought of his mother trying to foist him off onto a flock of young country girls, he lifted the calling card from the tray Adams held out for him. When he saw the name, his frown immediately faded and he found himself grinning in delight. All traces of his headache disappeared and he shoved to his feet.

He jogged from his study to the sitting room where guests were normally received, not caring that his mother might catch him and give him an earful about maintaining the dignity of his station. Stopping just inside the room, he took a moment to look his fill.

The man standing at the window was taller and slimmer than Kaidan, but with strong shoulders, and muscular limbs. Kaidan took in the dark green riding jacket, and tight buff pants tucked into shining black hessian boots, eyes lingering on the fine curve of the other man's buttocks. He should have announced his presence, but there was no need. The other man sensed him, and turned, and Kaidan was drawn in by dark blue eyes that sparkled with mirth.

"Alenko, it is good to see you again."

Kaidan let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "Shepard," he said by way of greeting. Speaking unfroze him and he strode across the room to take the man's hand in a firm handshake. Unable to resist, he pulled Shepard into a brief but tight hug. "It has been too long," Kaidan exclaimed when he leaned back from the too short embrace.

"Indeed," Shepard said in a low voice. "Business takes us both away from home far too often of late. Will you be home long, this time?"

"For at least several weeks," Kaidan answered. He backed away from the other man and walked to the sideboard. "Would you care for a drink?"

Shepard lifted his hand in a staying motion, bringing Kaidan's attention to the fact that he still held his hat in his hands. "Thank you, but no. I had hoped…" he trailed off and his blue eyes became shadowed. "Would you care to ride with me?"

Putting down the crystal decanter he'd lifted, Kaidan turned to face Shepard fully. Where was this hesitation coming from? "I would be delighted to," Kaidan said carefully. He tilted his head at Shepard. "It will be just a moment while I prepare."

Once he was out of the room, Kaidan rushed to his chambers and summoned his valet. His mind raced as he changed into garb appropriate for riding. Why was Shepard acting hesitant? Was he regretting their last encounter before Kaidan had left for London? He sincerely hoped not. That had been one of the most amazing moments of Kaidan's life, and he wanted more.

They had stepped outside to take a breath of cool air while they discussed Kaidan's upcoming trip to London. Shepard began to walk as he normally did. He'd always had too much energy and standing still made him irritable, and Kaidan followed as he always did. It was not unusual for them to take such strolls when they were together, nor was it unusual that they found themselves wandering through the topiary maze.

Kaidan had had more to drink than usual, frustrated with his mother's attempts at matchmaking. Falere was a lovely young woman, but he did not wish to marry. The combination of drink and the false sense of freedom for having escaped the party temporarily had put him in a strange state of mind. When the discussion had turned from his plans, to gentle teasing from his best friend about having to fend off the daughters of the ton, a madness had come over him. In the next moment he had Shepard pressed against a marble statue, and he'd given in to the urge to kiss him.

The memory of their kiss in Lady Samara's gardens made his heart pound. The feel of Shepard's hips under his fingers. The ease with which Shepard's legs spread to straddle his thigh. The taste of Shepard's mouth, the heat of his breath, the tiny whimper in the back of his throat when Kaidan bit down on his bottom lip.

It took an effort to convince his body to not react to the crystalline memories. The last thing he needed was for Jenkins to notice, and take it wrong. There was also the fact that he wasn't sure he had anything to be excited about. Shepard had not rejected his touch then, and had seemed just as flushed with pleasure as Kaidan had felt, but that had been in the dark seclusion of a garden with music and laughter wafting toward them from the open doors of the manse.

Did he feel different in the light of day? Would he have invited Kaidan to ride if he regretted their actions?

By the time Kaidan made his way back down to the sitting room where he'd left Shepard, he was wondering if the man would still be waiting for him.

Shepard was still there, facing the window again. When he heard Kaidan approach he turned, and his smile was bright and welcoming. Enough so that Kaidan thought he must have imagined the shadow from before.

They walked outside in silence, and Kaidan did his best to keep from stealing glances at his companion every few seconds. Once outside, his attention was caught by the beautiful black mare that stood calmly next to the groom holding her reins.

"A beauty, is she not?" Shepard asked proudly. He took her reins from the groom and petted her nose gently. "Mr. Moreau found her for me."

"Someday I am going to find out his price and steal him away from you," Kaidan said. His voice was tinged with awe as he stepped forward to stroke the mare's flank.

Shepard threw him an amused glance as the mare nudged him in the shoulder. Obviously she was as infatuated with Shepard and Kaidan was. "You will never steal my head groom with the pittance you could come up with," he teased.

Speaking of money was terribly rude, and Kaidan loved that Shepard didn't care. "Just because you are bloody Croesus," he grumbled. The sly smile Shepard gave him had his heart pounding again. Louder he said "What is her name?"

"Normandy," Shepard said. "She has one of those ridiculously long titles, but I cannot be arsed to remember it."

"Is she as fast as she looks?"

"Faster."

Kaidan grinned at the pride in Shepard's voice. "Mayhap she will prove it today," he said. His own horse was being brought forward by another groom. Eden was a lovely bay mare whose temperament was sweet until she had open land to run through and competition. She was already eyeing Normandy and beginning to paw at the gravel in impatience.

Shepard grinned at the challenge and leapt into his saddle. As Kaidan moved to mount his own horse, the front door of the manor opened, and his mother came out.

"Darling, you are not leaving are you?" she asked as she stepped delicately down to the drive. The Viscountess was a stately woman, wings of white sweeping back from her temples and streaking lightly through the rest of her black hair. She was more handsome than beautiful and it was obvious that Kaidan gained much of his looks from her. Even their eyes were the same shade of honey brown. Hers were currently looking at him with disapproval. "We may have guests this afternoon, and I was hoping you would be here to meet them. That lovely Miss Lawson and her sister-"

Knowing that he would probably pay for his rudeness later, Kaidan interrupted. "It is much too lovely a day out to spend it cooped indoors having tea with the neighbors, Mother," he said cheerfully. Before she could respond, he pulled himself into his saddle and smiled down at her. "Eden has missed me. I am taking her out for a jaunt."

"When may I expect you back?" she asked stiffly. Her eyes flicked to Shepard, and cooled considerably before turning back to Kaidan expectantly.

Kaidan threw a glance at Shepard, who was keeping his expression carefully blank. The answer to her question depended completely on the other man, but he certainly couldn't tell his mother that. "Later," he said simply. He tilted his hat at her respectfully, then turned Eden in a fast walk down the drive.

The crunch of hooves behind him told him Shepard was close on his heels. It was all Kaidan could do to keep from nudging Eden into a run until he was out of sight of the house.

"She's going to make you regret that," Shepard said grimly, bringing Normandy up alongside Eden. He was aware that Kaidan's mother didn't approve of him. She'd made it clear on more than one occasion that she felt that Kaidan would be better off with friends from the peerage rather than a young gentleman of the gentry, no matter how rich he was.

"Then I had better make sure it was worth it," Kaidan said. He winked at Shepard as he shoved his hat down tighter on his head, and kicked Eden into a run.

There was a string of curses behind him, then the pounding of hooves. He realized rather quickly that he was losing his lead, and he couldn't have that. Leaning down over Eden's neck, he whispered encouragement. She stretched out beneath him, letting herself fly across the grounds.

Movement brought his attention around. Normandy had come alongside Eden and was easily keeping stride. Shepard was grinning madly, and Kaidan knew his own expression was the same.

They were no longer attempting to win, although the horses did occasionally try to pull ahead of each other. They were simply riding to feel the wind against their faces, and to experience the exhilaration of the race.

Eventually they slowed, walking their winded mounts through the gently rolling hills. The silence between them was charged, yet companionable. Kaidan was more sure than ever that he'd imagined that moment of uncertainty earlier.

As was the way of English weather, the bright sunlight that had graced the beginning of their ride had began to fade as storm clouds gathered. Kaidan sighed. "I suppose that is a sign that I should go back and face my mother's wrath," he said morosely.

Shepard chuckled. "We will be drenched before we reach your home at this point," he said. That was the truth. They'd crossed from Kaidan's land onto Shepard's quite a while ago. "We may beat the storm there if we hurry."

"I do not believe we will reach it in time," Kaidan said as he kicked Eden into a canter. A flash of lightning followed closely by a crack of thunder emphasized his words.

His words were prophetic because only minutes later the sky opened up and began pouring water down on them. A shout from Shepard caught Kaidan's attention and they veered to the left where Kaidan could see a small Ionic Temple set back in some trees nearby. It was still partially open to the elements, but it had a small arch that would shelter the horses while he and Shepard sought the interior.

There was a bench built around the inner edge of the building, and Kaidan collapsed onto it laughing. "If I catch ill from this adventure, my mother will claim it as justice for abandoning her today."

Shepard grinned at him, and settled into an undignified sprawl on the bench next to him. "It would give you an excuse to avoid guests for a few days," he pointed out reasonably. He took his hat off and set it on the bench next to him, before tugging at his bedraggled cravat to loosen the damp cloth. His clothing was soaked through, revealing the strong muscles of his thighs through his breeches, and the shape of his arms.

Kaidan grunted and removed his own hat as well. He ran his fingers through his hair in a vain attempt to get the curls to stay out of his eyes. Next to him, Shepard sat up straight and turned slightly to face him. The movement brought Kaidan's attention to him and he found Shepard staring at him intently. He went still under that sharp blue gaze. "Shepard?" he said after a moment, when the other man said nothing.

"That is not what you called me that night," Shepard whispered. There was something in his expression that excited Kaidan. Something sharp and full of need. He leaned forward, and Kaidan held perfectly still.

When he had kissed Shepard in the garden all those weeks ago, he had been the aggressor, overwhelming the other man with his pent up lust. He'd been unsure of whether he had made a mistake or not. When he'd seen the uncertainty on Shepard's face earlier, he'd been sure that he'd ruined their friendship. Now he could see that Shepard obviously wanted him, but the uncertainty was still there. He needed Shepard to be the one to act this time. But he was unable to deny the naked request in Shepard's eyes. "Matthew," he whispered huskily.

"Kaidan," Shepard moaned as he closed the space between them.

The sound of his given name on Shepard's lips sent a shiver down Kaidan's spine. When their mouths came together, his head began to spin. Shepard's lips were as soft as he remembered them to be. He leaned into the kiss, cupping his friend's strong jaw in his hand. A nudge of his thumb encouraged Shepard to open to him, and he slid his tongue into the other man's mouth.

When Shepard whimpered in the back of his throat, Kaidan lost control. He exploded into motion, grabbing Shepard roughly and pulling him over his body until he straddled Kaidan's hips. Strong hands gripped Kaidan's shoulders, but not to push him away. Those hands moved, running over Kaidan's upper arms, and the back of his neck, kneading and stroking.

"Oh god, how I want you," Kaidan gasped against Shepard's mouth. "I want to taste all of you. I want to take you in my mouth and make you moan." Shepard moaned in response, and Kaidan nipped his bottom lip. "And then I want to be inside you, Matthew, to feel how hot and tight you are. If you'll let me."

Shepard sucked in a sharp breath and Kaidan winced, fearing he'd said too much. But when Shepard leaned back to look at him, his eyes were blown wide with lust. "Show me," he whispered. "Show me everything."

Kaidan stared up at him in shock. He'd dreamed of this. He'd been attracted to Shepard since they met in school, and he'd imagined so many things. Never had he dreamed that those things might actually come to pass. "Are you sure?" he asked hoarsely.

In answer, Shepard rolled his hips forward. He was rock hard, and pressed right against where Kaidan needed him most. Their damp clothing was hardly a barrier between them. "I am sure, Kaidan," he said firmly. He rolled his hips again. "I want you."

"Jesus," Kaidan swore harshly. "Stand up, now."

Shepard lifted a brow in question, but did as he was told. Kaidan sat up on the bench and looked up at the other man as he reached for the opening to his riding breeches. He didn't fumble with the laces as much as he thought he would. He was so excited, he felt like his hands should be shaking, but they were steady as he pulled the cloth down and away, revealing Shepard's hard length to his eyes.

He took a moment just to look. How many times had he wondered what this moment would be like? Too many times to count. So many times he'd stroked himself to completion imagining what it would be like to have Shepard standing before him like this. Well, maybe more naked, and less chilled from the rain, but this was close enough.

His eyes traced every vein and ridge before moving up to meet Shepard's eyes. A single clear drop of fluid oozed from the tip. Holding Shepard's gaze, Kaidan leaned forward and licked the velvety head of his erection, taking the droplet into his mouth.

Shepard bit his bottom lip, and his nostrils flared, but he didn't otherwise move.

Kaidan smiled and dropped his eyes back down to focus on the treat displayed before him. Shepard was thinner and longer than Kaidan. He was probably longer than Kaidan could comfortably take fully into his mouth. Wrapping his fingers around the base, he stroked upwards, chuckling when Shepard groaned. He stroked again, several times, slowly and firmly. When another bead of fluid emerged, Kaidan pulled the foreskin back, and took the head in his mouth. This time they moaned in unison.

With his free hand, Kaidan squeezed himself through the fabric of his own clothing, all the while suckling gently. He swirled and swiped with his tongue, stroking with his fingers what he couldn't reach with his mouth when he dipped down until he felt his gag reflex start to tickle the back of his throat.

"Christ," Shepard hissed. "You are good at this. Have you..?"

Kaidan let Shepard's hard length slip from his mouth with a pop. "Yes," Kaidan answered the unfinished question. He looked up to see Shepard's mouth turned down into what looked suspiciously like a pout. "Are you jealous?" he asked, half teasing, and half in surprise because it really appeared to be true.

When Shepard didn't answer right away, he explored with his tongue some more, but continued to look up, waiting for an answer.

"I…" Shepard moaned when Kaidan squeezed him. "I do not relish the idea of your mouth wrapped around someone else's cock."

Kaidan rewarded him with another squeeze and a soft kiss. Fluid was leaking steadily now, and it smeared across his bottom lip. He made sure Shepard was watching him, and then swiped his tongue out to lick his lip clean. To his delight, Shepard's eyes glazed over slightly at the sight. "It was a long time ago," Kaidan murmured. He remembered the young spanish boy fondly. Jaime Vega had been an enthusiastic lover, willing to teach Kaidan everything he knew. They had parted as friends when Kaidan left to finish the rest of his continental tour. "And yours is the only cock I want now."

He didn't say that he wanted more. What he felt for the younger man, both physically and emotionally, was considered sinful. Maybe it was, he thought as he flicked his tongue over damp flesh, but it was real, and it was powerful. He wanted Shepard. As a friend; as a lover.

And right at that moment, he wanted Shepard to feel how much Kaidan desired him. He opened his mouth and took the other man fully into his mouth. He tried to watch Shepard, but his eyes slid shut in bliss as his taste flooded over his tongue. He found a rhythm stroking with his lips, tongue, and hand.

He was uncomfortably hard, and every little sound Shepard made was going straight to his groin. He fumbled at the laces of his breeches, and groaned in relief when he managed to pull himself free. He began stroking himself almost in sync with what he was doing to Shepard.

Shepard's hands came up to cup the back of Kaidan's head. Fingers pressed gently, silently begging for more. Kaidan did his best to comply, breathing deeply through his nose and taking hard flesh as deep into his throat as he possibly could. Shepard's hips twitched slightly, but he did not thrust forward or try to press Kaidan further.

When he could take no more of into his mouth, Kaidan swallowed and Shepard made that tiny whimpering sound he found so endearing and sexy. He pulled back slowly, and opened his eyes to see his friend's expression.

Shepard's mouth hung open slightly, and his eyes were heavy lidded. In the dim light Kaidan could not see their color, but he knew how blue they were by memory. "Kaidan," Shepard murmured. "I am close… you should.. stop before…"

Kaidan let Shepard's cock slide from between his lips, but kept up the steady strokes of his hand. He allowed the head to rest against his bottom lip and watched Shepard's face contort. "I want to taste you when you finish," Kaidan said softly.

The hand at the back of Kaidan's head clenched, tugging at his hair and Shepard let out a whimpering cry. His head tilted up, and he sucked in a shuddering breath. Kaidan felt him grow even harder in his hand, and squeezed. A wash of hot wet seed sprayed against his lips just as Shepard dropped his head back down to watch.

"Oh, fuck," Shepard moaned. "Kaidan, I-"

He broke off when Kaidan licked his lips. "Come down here," he said hoarsely.

Shepard knelt before him awkwardly, but he didn't hesitate when Kaidan pulled him into a kiss. Once again he made that tiny whimpering noise and it was enough to drive Kaidan to his own release. He moaned into Shepard's mouth and twisted his hand sharply on the upstroke, catching the hot evidence of his orgasm in his palm. He used the lubrication it provided and stroked himself several more times, letting his body move into each touch.

When he finally came back to himself, he realized that Shepard was no longer kissing him. He was watching him with an inscrutable expression.

His heart sank. Had he made a mistake? What they'd done had been incredible. Please, please, he thought. Please at least don't hate me. "Shepard," he said out loud. He meant to apologize; to see if he could salvage their friendship.

Shepard frowned at him. "What happened to using my given name?" he asked.

Kaidan blinked. Shepard sounded hurt. "Matthew," he began again. "I am sorry, I-"

"No," Shepard snapped. "God damn you. Don't you dare apologize for this." He lunged forward, catching Kaidan's mouth in a rough kiss. His fingers dug into Kaidan's hair holding him in place. He broke away and pressed their foreheads together. This close, the blue of Shepard's eyes was obvious, and they burned into Kaidan. He spoke again, his voice rough. "Don't you dare, Kaidan."

Kaidan just stared at him. It was true that Shepard had accepted his advances, and this wasn't the first time. The kiss they'd shared in Lady Samara's garden had been sudden, and far too brief, but at no point had Shepard tried to push him away. And now, what they'd just done… Shepard had asked for it. But what had that shadow been? Kaidan's mind spun madly in an attempt to understand.

The skin under his mouth prickled, and he realized he still had Shepard's seed spread across his chin. Pulling back slightly, he dug a handkerchief from his pocket and brought it up to clean first his face, then his hand. Shepard released him, giving him the space he needed. "Matthew," Kaidan said as he tucked himself back into his breeches. "What we just did-"

"Kaidan-"

"No, hear me out," Kaidan said sharply. He sighed and gave Shepard an apologetic smile. "I do not intend to apologize again, I promise."

Shepard nodded, and began straightening his own clothes. His eyes dropped to the floor, and his shoulders tensed.

It struck Kaidan then, that Shepard was afraid to hear what he had to say. Was he afraid of rejection? "What we just did," he repeated slowly. "I do not regret it."

His friend's head came up sharply. "Then why apologize?"

"Because I was afraid I had pushed you too far," Kaidan said. "If my passions drive you from me, it would be like tearing away pieces of my own flesh." He reached out and stroked a finger along Shepard's jaw. "I am terrified you will realize that my desires are twisted and I will lose you."

A deep chuckle rose up in the taller man's chest, and bright blue eyes gleamed at Kaidan. "My seed is still fresh upon your tongue and you believe I would deny you my friendship?"

"Would you deny my love?"

They both blinked in surprise at the question. Kaidan felt his face flush, and he turned to watch the rain still falling in hard sheets outside the tiny stone building. He had not intended to speak of what was in his heart. He had held it in for so many years now, but now the words were there between them, and he could not regret it no matter how much he feared the answer to his question.

Long fingers cupped his jaw, applying gentle pressure until Kaidan turned to face Shepard again. He felt impaled by those blue eyes that he'd known since childhood. "I have never denied you anything," Shepard whispered. "I never will."

Kaidan stared up at Shepard, desperate to believe. The other man could have pushed him away at any time. He could have avoided Kaidan after that first kiss they shared. He could have demanded a duel. He could have-

But he hadn't. He'd come to Kaidan in friendship, as he always had. Since they were boys, they had been constant companions despite the slight difference in their ages. He saw truth in Shepard's eyes, and heard it echoed in his words.

This time when they kissed, it was Shepard who leaned down and pressed their mouths together. The touch of his lips was gentle, soft with hesitance. Unable to do anything else, Kaidan opened his mouth under the tender onslaught, and his heart soared.

After too short a time, Shepard lifted his head, but his strong fingers stayed at Kaidan's jaw. "Your mother needs no further excuse to despise me," he teased. "The rain has stopped, and if you do not return in one piece she may very well thrash me for keeping you out in this weather."

Kaidan laughed. "I am only whole with you at my side," he said.

"As am I," Shepard returned with a warm smile.

Once their clothes were pulled into a semblance of order, and they were mounted, Shepard turned to Kaidan with a wicked grin. "Do you still wish to avoid your mother's guests?" he asked.

Kaidan cocked his head at Shepard curiously. "You have a suggestion for how I could do so?"

Shepard kneed Normandy, bringing her close enough to Eden so that he could lean into Kaidan's personal space. His voice was low, and his blue eyes had a conspiratorial sparkle. "Come to my home tonight. I will send your mother a message that Eden threw a shoe, and I have offered you my hospitality. And then you can show me more of what you did this afternoon."

A devilish grin spread across Kaidan's face. He nodded, unaware of the arrogance in the gesture, and equally unaware of how much Shepard enjoyed seeing him that way. "Lead the way, my friend," he said.

Normandy pranced, eager to be home and Eden pawed at the grass in response. By unspoken agreement, they kicked their horses into a gallop, once again racing across the hills. Laughter trailed behind them.

_**Author's Note: There will probably be at least two more chapters. Cover art by Chenria on Tumblr!**_


End file.
